The cracking bubble or how to embrace the difference

And suddenly, I was outside there, outside of my wonderful and softly formed bubble, which I have been carrying around me my whole life long, which provided me confirmation through people with similar lifestyles; like a soft wadding ball protecting me from clashes with different realities.

 And suddenly, I was outside there, I felt so different. While my hands were still holding on to my-ah-so-perfect-reality, I felt alone in this new world, I felt like I entered without a purpose, without a gleam of belonging. While I desperately tried to remember what I actually wanted to do here and who I was at this new place, I had to confront the truth: I did not have any meaning here, unless I created it step by step. And it was not only that I had to make people understand who I was, I also had to confront their expectations and ideas on how people coming from my background were supposed to behave. 

Secretly, I caught myself talking from ‘they’ and ‘me’; and of course, if they behaved differently, my life would be so much easier. When I got the question ‘How long will you live here?’ – I better answered that my work contract is for two years, as the word ‘living’ sounded scary and unreal in my mouth – right now, it felt very far from living.Inka


It was not that I was standing outside of my old bubble from now onwards, rather, this old bubble was cracking, so that I could step in and out. It was deforming itself, it was overlapping with other bubbles, even if it was only for a few centimetres. 

And while it was still normal to start my day with cappuccino with extra milk foam, it also became a routine to eat my lunch with my hands. While I had to justify myself why I wanted to have a dog as pet or a a-coffee-to-go, I learned the beauty to prioritize social relationships before efficient productivity. While I believed my whole life that I had to gain importance by being endless busy and running from appointment to appointment, I discovered that I am important by just being there.

In short, your little life becomes so much wider.

I am still building my new life step by step, reminding myself to be patient in opening my bubble and embracing the difference. It feels like a mixture of being excited and scared, and I slowly let go my previous definitions of right and wrong.


But isn’t it also scary to live the whole life fenced in our little bubble minimized by social lines? On my journey, I am collecting and reflecting on few questions which can encourage you to reflect on and make your life wider:

Stepping outside

  • How many friends do you have who don’t have the same degree, who don’t come from the same country and who did not have a similar childhood than you?
  • When did you feel the last time different and your points of view were questioned?
  • How much do you actually know about and see from different realities around you?

Creating yourself within

  • What do you have in common with other people?
  • How can you add your ideas into an existing team?
  • How can you tell people your story, show them your personality and forming social bonds?

Embracing the difference

  • How would somebody with a different perspective experience your life?
  • Which images which you took for granted contrast with the reality?
  • What can you take from the new reality into your life?


Leave your comments